Saturday, September 27, 2008
Remembering My Dad
One year ago today, my Dad died and I miss him something awful.
We were not what one would say was close for the majority of years. We were Father and Son. In the last few years, we started to talk as adults who just happened to be related. He told me about his life and life in general and in those moments we became friends. We talked openly about his impending death and when he died I was okay with it.
My little sister called me at 4:15 A.M. to say that Dad, who had been admitted to the local hospital the afternoon before, had taken a turn for the worse. She suggested I might want to skip work and make the eight hour drive home. I said let's wait to see what happens because he was a strong man.
I laid back in bed to sort out what I had heard. At 4:30 A.M., my little sister called back to say that Dad had died.
For a year, I've been okay with my Father's death because we had talked about it and he was wanting to die, he had lived long enough, and didn't want any more. I was okay with that. Until this past Thursday when at work, during an unrelated moment alone, I totally lost it. I started shaking and crying and hearing his voice in my head. The last couple days have been hard, but I'm getting by and getting better as I remember.
The life of Indigo Red is full of adventure. Tune in next time for the Further Adventures of Indigo Red.